Who's Who in Charity? We continue to publish a series of interviews with actors and heroes of mercy.

Vera Remazhevskaya created her own method of teaching and rehabilitation of blind children to help her daughter. Today, the Lionok center for children with vision problems founded by her is the only one in Ukraine.

What awaits a blind person in our cruel world? The insulting name "disabled", meager assistance from the state, the feeling that you are not needed, you are a burden. Relatives, if they try to help, do not know how to do it. What to do? Who to contact for support?

All these questions immediately surrounded a young student from Lvov, Vera Remazhevskaya, when her newborn girl was diagnosed with a terrible blindness in 1980. We must pay tribute to the husband of the heroine of our story - he was not afraid of difficulties, conscientiously fulfilling the duties of the head of the family. But the main burden of caring for a blind child fell on the young mother. Kindergartens in the USSR did not deal with blind children. And she had to come up with everything herself. Humanities education did not give answers to her questions, there was no Internet then. Why the Internet - books by foreign psychologists could only be obtained in "special depositories". But what books couldn't give, it made up for mother's love, intuition, and innate pedagogical talent. I worked with my daughter as best I could, as best I could, as I felt.

When her daughter grew up and went to a school for blind children, Vera got a job there as a secretary-typist. Even then, she saw that thanks to homework, her daughter was better prepared for school than her peers. Remazhevskaya then already received the second in absentia higher education at the defectological faculty of the Pedagogical Institute. And gradually her intuitive developments on preschool and school education of children with visual impairments took the form of a coherent scientific system.

To realize her dream - to help the same mothers of blind children, Vera Nikolaevna in 1996 achieved the opening in her native Lviv of a unique educational and rehabilitation center "Levenya" ("Lion Cub") for children with visual problems - the only one in Ukraine, the head of which is to this day day. Here Remazhevskaya introduced her system of helping blind and visually impaired children.

    What are the features of the Remazhevskaya technique? To describe it very simplistically and briefly, it is based on “five pillars”:
  • Early development of residual vision, hearing, motor perception, fine motor skills of the hands. After all, 90% of the information about the world a common person receives through sight. And the blind person is deprived of all this - therefore, he has to compensate for sensory hunger, first of all, with tactile sensitivity. No wonder such people even read with their fingers - thanks to the Braille alphabet. It is important to note: often blind children do not like soft toys, because of their shapelessness they are not very informative for them. Instead, it is better for such children to give solid toys - you can use wooden ones, with the help of which it is much easier to master the forms of the world around them.
  • Early introduction to household self-service, education of independence. It is clear that the mother will quickly feed the blind child from a spoon, dress him, wash him. But it is much better if he does all this himself - albeit more slowly, albeit with mistakes, but constantly training and better knowing the world around him through practical activities.
  • Social adaptation, the ability to communicate with peers. It is important to tell the child about the reaction of the interlocutor - because he does not see it. Blind children clearly hear fatigue, lies, hidden emotions in the voice. For this reason, they make good psychologists, whose understanding of the mental state of the patient is so deep and unmistakable that it causes an almost mystical awe in those around him. By the way, the blind daughter of Vera Nikolaevna successfully graduated from the university and works as a psychologist at the Lionok Center.
  • Awareness of the importance of building relationships with other children in the family. If born blind youngest child- it is categorically not necessary to shoulder a significant part of the responsibilities for caring for him. There is nothing to say about younger healthy children. After all, everything must come from the heart - which is love in its purest form, impossible without freedom and voluntariness. And in no case should healthy children be deprived of love in favor of a “special” child - after all, she will return to him through her beloved and loving brothers and sisters. The understanding of this came to the Remazhevsky family when a healthy younger sister was born to a blind daughter.
  • And, finally, for the normal upbringing of a blind child, it is necessary for the parents to accept the situation. This is especially close to Vera Nikolaevna, an Orthodox Christian. After all, everything is the Will of God, His providence and plan. And how necessary it is to follow the prayer: “Lord, give me the strength to change what I can change; patience to endure what I cannot change; and wisdom to distinguish one from the other.

    And the latter happens, oh, how difficult. After all, all parents sincerely love their children and want them to be healthy. And what a shock the news turns out for them that their child was born blind. And these cases, alas, are observed more and more often. The number of children with developmental problems is inevitably growing. A few years ago, both Russia and Ukraine adopted the World Health Organization standards that any baby born prematurely after 20 weeks of pregnancy weighing more than 500 g will be considered a “premature baby”. Unfortunately, the statistics about such very premature babies is ruthless - in 90% of them, in addition to other pathologies, visual impairments, up to complete blindness, are observed.

    Of course, in such cases, parents immediately attempt to restore vision. But, alas, in most cases, medicine is still powerless. However, it is very difficult to come to terms with this. Trips to specialized clinics begin in search of the “most reliable”, expensive operations that do not bring the expected effect. Moreover, their implementation not only requires a lot of money from the pockets of parents, but also brings significant, and often irreparable harm to the weak health of the child. After all, most surgical interventions are performed under general anesthesia, and the drugs used for it are far from harmless to the cells of the immature brain. And the more narcotic drugs act on a young organism, the more likely it is that premature babies will develop additional problems.

    In such cases, it is important to understand in time that your life purpose is not to achieve a miracle, contrary to common sense, but to give your love to a “special” child. After all, with appropriate upbringing, a writer, psychologist, teacher, lawyer and, most importantly, just a real person can grow out of him. It is only important to remember, and Vera Nikolaevna always talks about this at meetings with parents: you cannot completely “dissolve” in caring for a child. After all, only a highly spiritual, self-valuable personality can bring up the same person. Remembering the name of the center founded by the heroine of our story, we can say that “a lion cub is born only to a lioness”, and it can be brought up as a lion only without betraying oneself ...

    No matter where parents call the Lionok center (and they call from Ukraine and other countries), they will be accepted as quickly as possible. For this, the center has rooms for round-the-clock stay, because not everyone can afford a hotel or a “private sector”.

    Cash donations? They are not rejected. After all, in addition to state funding, voluntary donors help the center. And, as in the story of the poor widow with her two mites, poor people donate more than rich people. Maybe because they sympathize with the same suffering, not because of abstract charity - but because they understand their pain and need with their hearts, as if they were their own. Moreover, help for children with vision problems and their parents does not end with the period of stay at Lion Cub, because the family will need it for quite a long time. Parents who apply to the Lionok center need the support of psychologists, otherwise their desire to cooperate may simply burn out. Therefore, the center's employees often, in their old company car, like an ambulance, go to those who need their help, within a radius of up to 100 km from Lviv.

    The founder of the Lionok Center has no commercial interest in the exclusive use of her methodology. In addition, Vera Nikolaevna is well aware that one center is not able to help all blind children in need. Therefore, she is happy to share her experience with teachers and doctors, both domestic and foreign. More recently, for example, colleagues from Nizhny Novgorod and Sofia.

    Thanks to this, the achievements of the heroine of our story are increasingly used in educational institutions for children with visual impairments. Methodological manuals for teachers and parents, special notebooks and textbooks for children are issued, and the Ministry of Education and Science, Youth and Sports of Ukraine also provides considerable assistance in this. True, these opportunities, in view of the permanent economic crisis recent years are rather limited. Unfortunately, the unique technique is still practically not presented on the Internet.

    Perhaps the introduction of the method of Associate Professor Remazhevskaya would have gone faster if she had agreed to move to a more influential position, and then these developments would have gained the force of mandatory recommendations. Vera Nikolaevna laughs: "It's not for me." The center became a real “third child” for her, and “they never leave their children,” says V. N. Remazhevskaya. A real teacher, she cannot imagine herself without practical work with children - and there is hardly enough time for this.

    Our heroine is also the head of the department correctional pedagogy Institute of Postgraduate teacher education. So the knowledge so generously distributed falls on the right soil. Well, the fact that not all specialists in Ukraine fulfill these recommendations is that “you won’t be forced to be nice.” If there is no desire to improve oneself, there is no faith in a positive result, then the work will bring neither joy to the teachers themselves, nor benefit to children with visual impairments.

    Actually, the interview was taken from her during the vacation, which, according to the information received by the author of the article from the secretary of the director of "Lion cub", differs from the usual work only in a more free schedule for visiting the "vacation" of the workplace. Instead of rest - regular seminars, trips, meetings with employees. And, most importantly, work with children and their parents.

    • Surely, you pay attention not only to his words, but also to appearance, demeanor, facial expressions, gestures, etc. Psychologists have found that these non-verbal elements, most of which are perceived visually, make up 60-70% of interpersonal communications.

    It is this share of information about the interlocutor that a blind person loses in the process of communication. Moreover, this is also reflected in his external behavior - due to the lack of feedback, the facial expressions and gestures of the blind are often poor and even inadequate, which can make it difficult for others to perceive them.

    Don't be fooled by first impressions if your blind chat partner looks a little odd. It’s just that he could never personally observe the communication of people: he didn’t see what gestures they use, how they move and what they are wearing. Don't focus on external characteristics, and then, perhaps, you will realize that you are communicating with an interesting person who has his own hobbies, family and work.

    Nevertheless, some non-verbal elements are used by the blind as a source of information about the interlocutor. These include voice and speech characteristics, such as volume, tempo, intonation, etc. For example, emotional condition Blind people usually evaluate their partner by their voice. According to many blind people, the sound of the voice and speech manners also create the first emotional impression of a person. In addition, gait and general style human movements.

    Contrary to popular belief in the social practice of the blind, tactile perception is unacceptable to obtain information about the appearance of others. So, in the story "The Blind Musician" by V.G. Korolenko, depicting a scene in which Petrus feels Evelina's face, described an uncharacteristic case. The blind, even children, do not feel the faces of those around them.

    Visual interaction usually plays a big role in communication. We often use a glance at a partner as a signal of readiness to communicate, and eye contact helps to maintain feedback. The inability to use the communicative meaning of the gaze seriously complicates the communication of the blind with strangers, especially the establishment of initial contact. There are cases when the interlocutor could not concentrate and carry on a conversation with a blind person due to the lack of eye contact with him.

    In order to avoid such situations and communication with the blind does not seem awkward to you, I would like to offer some recommendations that, in our opinion, can help to better understand the problems and opportunities of the visually impaired and facilitate communication with them.

    In the relationship between the sighted and the blind, one cannot take blindness as the starting point. First of all, a complex of universal human qualities operates here: character, erudition, appearance, and then a physical defect is already taken into account. If fate brings you into contact with a blind person, know that this is the same person as you, that he lives in the same world with you with the same feelings, thoughts, concerns.

    Do not jump to conclusions (neither positive nor negative) about personal qualities a blind person based on previous experience of communicating with other blind people, because blind people differ from each other no less than sighted people.

    When communicating with the blind, do not show pity, do not rush to express your condolences, sentimental sympathy. Behave smoothly, calmly, show the necessary exactingness, but at the same time care.

    When talking with a blind person, do not choose his companion or relatives as an intermediary, but address him directly.

    Do not forget that a blind person does not see the looks and gestures addressed to him. Therefore, if you want to start a conversation with a blind person, you need to make it clear (in words or with a light touch) that you are addressing him, looking at the interlocutor in this case is not enough (of course, we are not talking about obvious situations, for example, when you are in room only together with a blind person).

    Since many words and expressions related to vision are often used in a much broader sense (for example, “we will see” often means “We will recognize”, etc.), the blind also actively use them. In a conversation with the blind, use the usual (traditional for the sighted) vocabulary, do not say “feel” or “touch” instead of “look”.

    Remember that blindness is a painful topic for many blind people, many of them do not like to talk about its causes, their feelings about it, etc. Therefore, try not to show excessive curiosity, and if you still decide to ask a blind person about his blindness, do it tactfully and be prepared for him to refuse to discuss this topic.

    Those who have sight in the presence of a blind person should avoid explaining to each other only with the help of facial expressions and gestures. The blind person notices this and feels excluded from communication.

    In a noisy room, do not move away from the blind without warning him about it. With a lot of noise, he may not notice that you have moved away, and continue to speak into empty space. And then, discovering that you are not there, he will feel embarrassed. And accordingly warn when you return, otherwise the blind will think that you are still absent.

    If you leave a blind person alone in a room with the lights on, do not make the decision yourself, ask the blind person whether to leave the light on or turn it off.

    When meeting with a blind man, do not guess and do not ask him if he recognizes you, it is better to introduce yourself immediately after the greeting.

    It is easier for the blind to navigate in a familiar room and find the necessary items if things are in the places allotted to them. The blind person does not have the ability to quickly get a general picture of the room, as the sighted do, looking around the room. Therefore, in order to detect any object rearranged from its usual place, he will have to sequentially examine the room.

    Remember that specific difficulties are experienced not only by the completely blind, but also by the visually impaired - people who have profound visual impairments, but have not lost it completely. Therefore, do not be surprised (and even more so do not be offended) if your visually impaired acquaintance passed by without saying hello to you. Even if he looked in your direction, it does not mean at all that he recognized you.

    Orientation in space and independent movement of the blind are seriously complicated by strong wind and precipitation, uncleared snow, loud and prolonged sounds (engines running, children playing, etc.). Therefore, if you see a blind person walking in the same direction as you, offer your help. Also, for the blind, assistance when crossing the road is especially important.

    A sighted person should first ask a blind person if his help is needed and, having received a positive answer, help. If your kind offer is rejected, don't get angry, don't get irritated, and remember that there are blind people who prefer independence to someone else's help.

    You should not “regulate” the movements of a blind person with your voice at a distance. If this is unavoidable and the blind is in danger, one should not only clearly and accurately tell the blind what to do, but also inform him of the reason (for example, stop, there is a pit ahead).

    If you are accompanying a blind person, ask which side is more convenient for him to walk. Preferences different people may be different, however general rules it is recommended that the escort should walk on the right, that is, on the side where there are more obstacles (green spaces, poles, stalls, etc.).

    When moving, the blind person slightly takes the escort by the arm and walks, lagging half a step behind. In this position, a blind person can receive information about the nature of the road (ascents, descents, etc.) from your movements. However, it is better to specifically warn about difficult obstacles (a steep staircase, a puddle that needs to be stepped over, etc.). When an unaccompanied person holds on to your hand, but, on the contrary, you take him by the arm, in the process of movement an uncomfortable position arises for the blind person, in which he must walk a little ahead of you, and you involuntarily push him.

    Before descending or ascending stairs, ask the blind person how it is more convenient for him to walk arm in arm or hold on to the railing.

    When walking with a blind man and carrying a suitcase, briefcase, etc., if possible, do not carry them in the hand that he is holding on to (otherwise the burden will hit his legs).

    Do not leave the blind person alone on the roadway, on the open porch or in the doorway, take him to a safe place.

    If possible, inform the blind about changes in environment(rearrangement of furniture, road works, blocking traffic on the street, etc.

    If you notice a blind person at a bus stop, offer him your help. When the necessary transport arrives, it is enough to bring the blind man to the door and, if possible, indicate the handrail by placing his hand on it. Then the blind man will manage on his own. If for some reason you cannot continue to wait (for example, you need to leave on an approaching transport), be sure to inform the blind person about this, otherwise he will continue to wait for your help. In this case, you should not feel awkward.

    When leaving the vehicle, do not try to support the blind person from behind, it is better to get out first and give a hand.

    In public places or in transport, do not try at all costs to seat the blind, first ask if he wants it. To help the blind to sit down, you need to show him where the seat is. To do this, it is enough to put the hand of the blind on the back of a chair or seat.

    When serving a visually impaired person at the table, do not give him cutlery in his hands, do not put them on his plate, just tell the blind person where the cutlery is. After that, he will find everything himself.

    One must always inform the blind what food is on the table so that he can choose according to his taste.

    If you introduce a blind person to any object, do not forcefully move his hands along the surface, but slightly point your hand at the object, let the blind person touch it himself.

    At the same time, you can focus the attention of the blind on details that are interesting from your point of view.

    Helping blind people is a good thing. The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: "Paradise will become obligatory for those who help a blind person walk forty steps".

    Gulnaz Sabitova

    Everyone should be able to help those in need. Even if there are no blind people in your environment, life can push you against such a person. That is why we propose to learn the appropriate rules of conduct.

    Help when crossing the street

    • Ask if the blind person needs help. There are cases when people, trying to help, misunderstood the intentions of another person. For example, they were transferred across the street when a person was waiting for a tram.
    • Let him know that you will move him across the street.
    • Take your hand and carefully lead, warning about the rises, descents, steps, sidewalks.

    Help with transport

    • Help the blind person who has entered the transport to carefully go forward.
    • Show the handrails by placing his hand on them.
    • If the person needs to get out of the vehicle, let them do it themselves.
    • If you are leading a blind man, lead the way, pointing to the handrails and steps.
    • When getting into the car, bring it to the open door and put your hand on its upper edge, the other hand on the roof.
    • In any case, when meeting a blind person on the street or in transport, first offer him your help, but do not impose it.
    • Seeing off, invite him to lean on your hand. Don't push him or take him by the arm.
    • Blind people sense movement and follow you automatically, so you don't have to voice your turn.
    • Leading him through the door, go ahead, extending your hand back.

    Help on sidewalks and slopes

    • On the sidewalks, inform the blind person about the upcoming descent and ascent, without preventing him from feeling the surface with a cane.
    • In front of the steps, it is enough to say: “Attention, steps,” and indicate the direction (up or down).
    • Help him put his hands on the railing, pointing to the side they are on.
    • If there is a choice - stairs or escalator, warn the blind and give him the choice.

    Help in the store

    • When helping a blind person into a store, escort them to the salesperson or to the appropriate department.
    • If he knows exactly what he needs, then he can buy the goods immediately. Otherwise, lay out the assortment in front of him so that he can feel it.
    • Describe the color and pattern to the blind person. It is allowed to give advice, for example: "This color does not suit you."
    • If the person does not name the denomination of the banknote himself, then you should say which banknote you received.
    • Change is recommended to be counted by putting it in the hand of the blind.

    Don't be afraid to talk!

    Do not focus on the illness of the person you are helping. However, you must remain tactful. Sometimes the blind themselves can joke about their position. From the outside, talking to them can seem difficult. Feel free to use the verbs "look" and "see". These words are used by all people. Be patient and don't ask unnecessary questions. Keep the conversation casual and don't get nervous to say too much.

    According to the Department of Health and Human Services, there are 4.3 million people who are blind or visually impaired in the United States. Many of us have such people among our acquaintances and we would like to support them, but not everyone knows how to behave and be useful. Warn the person when you enter the room, ask how you can help - this is quite simple ways show courtesy and help a blind person. First of all, your behavior should be based on respect and understanding of the fact that the person you want to help is not just a blind person.

    Steps

    Basic standards of courtesy

      Say hello loudly. When you enter a room where a blind person is already present, a loud greeting will alert them to your presence. If you remain silent until you approach this person, he or she may think that you appeared out of nowhere, and this can embarrass anyone.

      • Identify yourself so that the person understands who you are dealing with.
      • If a person offers you a handshake, then do not refuse.

    1. Report when you leave the room. It's not always intuitive, but care should be something to say. You should not rely on the fact that a person will hear your receding steps. Leaving without warning is just impolite, because the person may continue to contact you. Such an awkward situation is frustrating.

      Offer your help. If it seems to you that your help does not fit the person, then instead of making assumptions, it is best to ask directly. Politely offer, "Let me help you?" If the answer is yes, then ask what you should do. But if the answer is no, then it is impolite to insist. Many blind people have learned to do very well without any outside help.

      • If your help is ready to accept, then do only what is asked. Often sighted people take on too much out of good intentions, and such behavior can offend a blind person.
      • In some cases, you don't even need to ask. For example, when everyone sits down at the table, and a blind person is already sitting, then there is no need to come up and ask how you could help. Try to feel the situation, not guess.

    2. Ask questions directly. Many do not have experience with blind people and do not know how they should be treated. For example, in a restaurant, waiters often address a person sitting next to a blind person when they offer the blind person more water or bring a menu. Blind people can't see, but they can hear everything, so always speak directly to them.

      Use the words "look" and "see". You may be tempted to change your language habits and try not to use words like "look" and "see". Better use them, otherwise an awkward situation may arise. A blind person will be unpleasant not from using these words, but from the fact that you speak to him differently than to everyone else.

      • Feel free to say phrases like "It's great to see you."
      • But don't use the words "look" and "see" to describe this person's actions. For example, if a person is at risk of stumbling on something, then it is better to say “Stop!”, Not “Watch your feet!”

    3. Guide dogs should not be stroked. These are specially trained animals that are designed to protect the life and safety of blind people. Blind people rely on guide dogs for orientation and should not be called or petted. If the dog is distracted, a dangerous situation may arise. Don't distract your dog. You can iron it only if the blind person himself offered it to you.

      Do not speculate about the lives of the blind. Asking a lot of questions or discussing the issue of blindness is unethical. They answer questions like this all the time. Every day they find themselves in places and situations in which the sighted feel more comfortable. You will do much more courtesy by talking to a blind man about the most ordinary things.

      • A common myth often asked about by the blind is their incredible hearing or sense of smell. The blind have to rely on these senses much more than the sighted, but they do not have any superpowers, and it is ugly to assume such a thing.
      • Usually the blind do not like to talk about the reasons for their blindness. They can start this conversation themselves. Only then can you ask a few questions.

    4. Help me walk up the stairs. First, state whether to go up or down, and describe the approximate slope and length of the stairs. Then put the blind man's hand on the railing. If you are leading a person, then take the first step and wait for the person being guided to keep up with you.

      Help to get through the doorways. Approaching the door, the blind person should be on the side of the hinges and he should be told in which direction the door opens. First, open the door and go through it yourself. Then place the blind man's hand on the doorknob and let him close the door behind you both.

    How to learn to continue to enjoy life when the eyes are forever shrouded in a veil?

    If a person, due to vision problems, ceases to recognize his neighbors in the stairwell, cannot even read a newspaper with the strongest magnifying glass or follow the movements of football players on a television screen - he puts up with it. But then the moment comes: he goes to the mirror and ... does not recognize his face. Instead of himself, the blind person sees only a strangely blurry, indistinctly hazy image, reminiscent of the paintings of some "especially advanced" contemporary artists. And he becomes really scared and even creepy.

    The mirror "disappeared" ...

    In a person who has completely lost his sight, the situation is even more difficult. Typhlologists (specialists in the rehabilitation of the blind and visually impaired) speak in this case of the psychological effect of the “disappearance of the mirror”. The inability to look at one's own reflection is perhaps the most painful consequence of blindness. This is the hardest thing to deal with.

    “When a patient loses his sight, for him this situation is not just stressful, but truly shocking. Almost no one succeeds in avoiding a depressive state in the first few months of blindness, ”says Yulia Lomakina, a psychologist at the St. Petersburg Center for Medical and Social Rehabilitation of the Visually Impaired.

    “Do not take me for a madman, but sometimes I catch myself thinking that, as it were, I am separated from my own body, becoming just a blind and invisible spirit,” wrote Dmitry Gostishchev, a blind journalist and writer from Stavropol, in one of his essays.

    Not only people who have lost their sight, but also, for example, prisoners placed in a light-tight punishment cell, after a few days begin to experience strange sensations - as if they are dissolving in the surrounding darkness. In the first days, weeks and even months, blindness is often associated with the patient's own death.

    Give it a chance to change!

    “An acute, painful reaction to vision loss is completely natural and normal,” Yulia Lomakina explains. – It is important that both the “victim” himself and his relatives keep calm and presence of mind. It is necessary to give the body the opportunity to rebuild, get used to "life in the dark."

    It often seems to a person that his suffering will continue forever, until the end of his life. In fact, even in the most severe cases, the period of adaptation to blindness usually lasts no more than a year. During this time, the patient is able not only to get used to his new position, but actually return to his former life. A year later, blind people are able to take care of themselves without outside help, keep the house clean, wash and iron their clothes, sew on buttons, and cook simple meals on an electric or gas stove.

    When a person has learned to navigate well in his own home, it's time to "go out to Big world', to navigate your way hometown or the village. It is quite possible to learn 10-15 routes per year.

    Homework is the best therapy

    Is it reasonable to show the blind close person your sympathy? Will it help in the recovery process? Or will it only cause bitterness and despair?

    The question is not simple. In the first days, weeks and even months, words of empathy are appropriate. But “mourning” a blind man all his life is wrong. The task of relatives, friends and relatives is to show the person in trouble: he can lead a harmonious, successful, prosperous and even happy life.

    Disability should not be confused with helplessness. Visually impaired people, if blindness is not associated with other serious illnesses or advanced age, usually do not need care. Moreover, doing homework for them is one of the effective ways rehabilitation.

    A blind person often cannot continue to work in their specialty. This leads to a feeling of worthlessness. The problem can be solved very simply: it is necessary to review and redistribute family responsibilities. At the same time, work should not be divided into male and female.

    The question often arises: is it necessary to carry out some kind of redevelopment or reconstruction of housing so that a blind family member feels comfortable? That is unnecessary. There is no need to create any "special conditions" for a blind person. It is only important not to rearrange the furniture and not to move things from place to place without informing the blind relative about it.

    My wife is the most beautiful!

    A blind person sometimes loses confidence in his own attractiveness, in attractiveness for the opposite sex. This is especially true for women. In this situation, it is very important that a sighted husband supports his blind wife, often tells her: “You are my most beautiful! You are my best!"

    It is quite possible to learn how to use cosmetics without visual control. A blind person, if desired, can look not just neat and tidy, but smart and elegant. This is also an important part of therapy.

    In relationships between people, eye contact is very important, the ability to "look into the eyes and see the soul." In a marriage with a blind person, there is no such possibility. Sometimes this leads to annoying misunderstandings. For example, during a conversation, a blind person may suddenly begin to shake his head or turn his head in the other direction. To a sighted person, such behavior seems to be a manifestation of inattention. But there is no malice here. Delicately ask your interlocutor to always keep his head strictly towards the speaker - and communication will become more pleasant for both parties.

    There are other incidents as well. When visiting public places, blind people are sometimes perceived as "dumb creatures". For example, a sighted wife accompanies her blind husband to the doctor. And the doctor does not even think of addressing the patient directly. He asks the guide: "What happened to your husband?" Waiters often behave the same way. It doesn’t occur to them that a “special” visitor wants and can place an order himself. In this situation, it is better for the escort not to express dissatisfaction, but instead to politely but clearly ask the "officials" to address the visually impaired person directly.

    Magic touch

    How does the lack of vision affect intimate life? During gatherings in the Society of the Blind, you can hear many remarkable stories. It is often said that women who have experienced pleasure in the arms of the "blind knight" will never be able to meet with sighted men. Even if they part with their current lover, they will still look for a new gentleman only in the "blind" environment. The point, they say, is in special magical touches that only the blind have.

    Believe it or not - everyone decides for himself. But the fact remains: there are many successful Don Juan among the visually impaired. And blind beauties are not far behind. The secret of this attraction is simple. The human body generously compensates for the lack of one of the senses: in the absence of vision, the sense of touch is enhanced. With the help of the fingertips, a blind man or a blind woman delivers such pleasure to a partner that no “big-eyed” Casanova is capable of. Of course, the "blindness" of one of the spouses is a huge blow to the whole family. But the tragedy that has occurred paradoxically helps the couple rediscover each other.

    Psychologists also talk about the “invisible man effect”. When communicating with the blind, the "eye" can see his interlocutor, and the opposite side is deprived of this opportunity. Psychologically, this situation is very comfortable for sighted people. It helps them relax, open up, feel more confident, get rid of complexes and internal fears, so communication is more trusting and sincere.